Being a parent is both exhilarating and exerting in equal measure. You swing from having a very tender moment with your children to yelling about the toys on the floor like a lunatic. While the general thrust of being a parent is relatively constant, the children themselves are not. Children are unique in their mannerisms, personalities, and bents. The same way we as adults can interpret one thing in diverse ways is the same way our children are wired to be. They all need nurturing in different ways that best speak to their individuality. Answering the question "What are the four types of parenting styles?", will help you to evaluate yourself and hopefully, make you a better parent.
What Are The Four Types Of Parenting Styles?
How you bring up your child will go a long way in dictating who they eventually grow to become and how they view the world around them. You can opt to be harsh and not give them room to air their views or move to the other extreme where you give them too much latitude. The best approach is one that combines discipline and firmness with care, warmth, an intimate relationship and an understanding of your child's nature. The implication here then is you need to be aware of how you were brought up, how you parent your children, and the relationship between the two to determine whether you are doing the best job or if there is room for improvement. In the 1960s, clinical and developmental psychologist Diana Blumberg Baumrind identified a category of four different types of parenting techniques that describe common approaches parents use to raise their children.
We shall discuss each of them in detail now.
Authoritarian parenting is bringing up children in an environment where there are strict rules they must obey without question. Obedience is taken as a must and any deviation results in instant reprimand. The parents enforce rules and structure but they rarely, if at all, have a relationship with their children. The underlying principle of this style of parenting, as stated, is a demand for total obedience without question. Whenever the children question the guidelines set for them, they are often met with "Because I said so!" Such parents need to remember it is much healthier for children when they know why they are being asked to obey the rules set for them. Dialogue coupled with discipline will yield better fruit than unquestioning fealty. Parents in such a situation need to temper their harshness with some warmth and nurturing to be more responsive to their young ones. Children raised in this manner develop relatively poor social skills, have low self-esteem, will be prone to associating obedience to love and may battle with depression and anxiety.
Continue for the details on the next primary type of parenting style now.
Authoritative parenting is where one raises their children by placing high expectations on them, but also giving them the tools, love, and care they need to be successful. As a parenting style, it is considered the most balanced and one that untimely develops well-adjusted children. Since all children are unique in their own right, parents are encouraged to treat them differently and deploy parenting skills compatible with each child's make up. An approach such as this plays to each child’s strengths as compared to a one size fits all strategy which might stifle some of them. Parents in this category reason with their children, reasonably enforce rules and structure, listen to their children, and are warm with them. Children brought up in such an environment tend to possess excellent social skills, have healthy self-esteem levels, good self-control, and are emotionally balanced. They also learn to be independent in a befitting manner without abusing its privileges. Children from such backgrounds also tend to form deeper relationships with their parents as they grow.
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Parenting permissively, also known as indulgent parenting, is where children are brought up in an environment that places few expectations on them in regards to rules and structure. Parents who opt to raise their children in a permissive manner genuinely care for them, but they do not view them as mature enough to exercise self-control when it comes into play. Indulgent parents are usually loving and nurturing towards their children. They do not discipline them as often and instead tend to approach dealing with them from a friend perspective. Due to lax rules at home, their enforcement becomes inconsistent.
Indulgent parenting can lead to the children not being able to make decisions, develop poor time-keeping habits and struggle with addressing conflict. Permissive parents should institute a more rigorous structure and find ways to be firm, yet loving, with the children to help them develop self-control. They should also create a habit of rewarding any good behavior to encourage disciple in their children. The key here is to balance nurture and discipline.
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Uninvolved parenting, otherwise known as neglectful parenting, is a style of rearing children marked by parents not responding to the needs of their children. Neglectful parents tend to be away from home for extended periods and disconnect with the children. Even when home, they do not focus on the children, and as a result, they are unaware of the life their child leads outside of the home. The degree of neglect varies with each instance of this style. Some uninvolved parents neglect their children entirely, whereas others are quite hands off but still maintain a few rules.
The most heartbreaking situations are those where parents completely reject their children. The children raised by such parents tend to become independent early on as a matter of survival. They experience fear and anxiety and are highly likely to become delinquent teenagers. Such children will struggle with forming relationships with others as adults as there is barely any life experience that teaches them this interpersonal skill. Neglectful parenting ultimately harms the child by denying them useful skills learned from home.