Strategies For Getting People To Like You

Sometimes, people feel insecure about themselves, unsure about how they are perceived and if others like them. There are many ways a person can assure themselves as a pleasant company and someone others can count on. Although it is rather simple to become a likeable person, lack of confidence may get in the way and make the lines a bit blurry, therefore this list might help to clear things up a bit. It is important to notice that no one can please everyone, but it is important to value those whose opinions matter.

Let Them Talk About Who They Are

People in general like to talk about themselves, so a way to get into their good books is to be a good listener. It may appear self indulgent, but studies show that when someone talks about themselves, their brain is stimulated in the same way as when they talk about food or money. In order to get someone's attention and leave a good impression, one must ask about heir lives, their career, interests, pets and partners, and explore these subjects. However, they must be careful not to push it too much, otherwise they may come across as a nosy person who is too interested in someone else's business.

Do Not Brag

People are constantly trying to out do each other and come across as the better person. When someone shares a fact about themselves, another person will try to make it personal and appear more important. If an individual says "I am planning a trip abroad", the other may add that they have been abroad several times and try to give tips not for the first person's sake, but to show how much they know about the subject that it is being discussed. If someone wants a person to like them, let them have their moment instead of trying to out do in this conversation. They should not make is to themselves, and instead let the other person talk about their experiences.

Try To Avoid Disagreements

Humans do not like to hear when someone disagrees with them. It instantly puts them in a defensive mode where it is easy to start a fight. Science studies shows that this kind of reaction results from a trigger that shutdown the logical side of the brain, therefore it is hard for someone to get another person to like them when they have triggered a confront. The best way to avoid it, is to not point out when someone is incorrect unless it is absolutely necessary. If they must disagree, it is better to be careful on how they do it. The best approach is to point out how interesting is the perspective from which that person sees the subject in question and ask how did they come to that conclusion.

Ask for Their Opinion

The best w

ay to influence people is to value their advice. A study shows that seeking advice in the workplace is the best way to gain respect as it suggests that the person whose opinion is being asked is valued. By showing confidence in someone else's advice, one makes them feel important about themselves, which results on them appreciating the individual who made them feel that way. Another angle where this can be looked from, is the trust side. A person appears vulnerable when they confide a secret or a problem in someone else, which makes them appear less threatening and more like a friend who relies on them.

Let the Body Express the Feelings

Body language is just as important as words. Someone who says positive things should let their bodies tell the same story. Words that do not match someone's body language can appear disconnected, making that person come across as insincere or fake. Eye connect shows that someone's focus is entirely on the other person, but without a smile it can appear threatening. Open hands and open arms - as in no crossed arms - shows that this person is open to what others have to say. A smile can be soothing and display trust. One must not forget to have their body angled toward the person who they are talking to, as showing their back would suggest that they are closed off.

Do Not Give Order

Asking a question can be a friendly way to give an order. Instead of bossing others around - even if a person is in the position to do so - they can gain more respect if they ask a question instead. Studies show that it has the same response as giving an order, but without giving a dominant feeling. In a work environment, instead of informing a co-worker that something should be done at a specific time, asking them if they think they could have it done by that time and informing them about how helpful it would be will make the situation a lot lighter, and the co-worker will not feel like he is being used for a task.

Tilt the Head

This is something connected to the instinctive side of the human being, stretching back to their ancestors in the animal kingdom. When a person tilts their head, they expose their carotid, which shows that they do not pose a threat nor are they afraid of the person with whom they are talking to. It is a sign of trust which also displays interest - everyone has seen a dog doing it and they all must agree that there is nothing cuter than a puppy tilting their head. Nothing must be said in this context, just a slight tilt will do in order to make a person feel comfortable in one's presence.

Ask for a Favor

People enjoy doing favors for others, it makes them feel useful. Although some people may doubt it, it is a scientific fact. When a person is asked for a favor, they are given the opportunity to feel good about themselves, which they associate with the interaction they had with the person who made the request. They feel trusted, useful, and set apart from others. It is important to note that these should be small favors or at least match the kind of relationship two people have. If a favor is a bit too big, it comes across as an inconvenient request and can be perceived as plainly disrespectful.

Mirroring a Person

This is not about copying someone else. Copying someone will make it seem like they are either being made fun off or that the other person does not have a personal identity, trying to imitate what someone else does. This is about showing someone that they are receiving attention. By taking on similar hand gestures and body movements, it is a quite a discreet way to show someone that they are on the same page. A person feels like others agree with them when their bodies move in a similar way.

Laughing at Their Jokes

No one likes to be ignored when them make a joke, or even worst, when no one laughs. By laughing at a person's joke, it makes them feel like they are being understood. It shows that they are being given attention. Most people like to be considered someone who has a good sense of humor, so it is good to show that what they want to see. It is also a great way to make things less informal and find a common ground on something which is not a serious matter. Laughing makes people feel good, and by laughing together they create a bond over a good experience.

Be Happy

It is an obvious statement to say that people would rather be happy than sad, therefore they try to keep companies who reflect the way they want to feel. When someone is constantly complaining, it drives people away, even if they are making a good point. A person who is always bothers by the weather, Monday mornings, or a bad/unlucky thing that happened to them will always push people away. Being optimistic and generally display a good mood is always something the people look for in their companies. Of course, being overly excited can be annoying, so the best way to do this is to be genuine - someone who appears to be happy even about no-so-great things may seem sarcastic.

Be Open

There are two things that people really appreciate: being able to relate to someone they admire and being able to laugh about them. A person who has a seemingly perfect life may be admired by others, but they can also seem intimidating. People like to find relatable things to talk about, therefore to really gain someone's trust, one must be open about they flaws and be able to laugh about themselves. Trying to gain respect but appearing flawless will make people wonder about what the mysterious flaw could be, so it is always better to let them know straight away instead of running the risk of being considered fake. The more a person reveals their embarrassing stories, more others will be inclined to trust them.

Act Like You Like Them

A study asks their participants to have a ten-minute conversation. They have then pulled aside and told that the other person either liked them or did not like them. The conclusions are that this knowledge affected how much they liked the other person by almost 50 percent. This proves that if someone understands that they someone else likes them, the chances for them to have a good impression of that individual are higher, therefore to higher someone's chance of being liked, they must let it show.

It is worth noting that pretending to like someone when these feelings are not honest instantly makes a person untrustworthy.

Treat Them Like an Old Friend

It can be hard to meet new people; trying to cause a good impression, make their points come across and get to know the other can induce a certain level of anxiety. However, pretending that a stranger is an old friend can make things a lot easier. It will also create a bond as it creates a safe space for both people - by being treated like an old friend, a person is more likely to relax and feel at ease. The same way that when someone acts as if they like someone it may help the other person to like them, someone who pretends that they have liked someone for years when in fact they just met may help them to actually like that person.

Being Vulnerable

When someone is in a vulnerable situation, they cope with it by connecting with others that find themselves in the same place. People claim to have found it easier to make friends when they were in school, but that is because at that time everyone was in the exact same position. A great way to bond with someone is by getting together to do something scary or out of their comfort zones. Stress inducing experiences my create a stronger connection than a relaxing day out or a merely pleasant dinner.

The Two Questions

A common trick to get someone to feel good about themselves is to ask the two questions. The first one should be a question that the answer is already known. For example, if a person knows that another has been recently promoted or had another positive even taking place, they should be asked about that. After the question is answered, the second ones is just about their lives in general. When someone talks about a positive experience and are soon asked about their general like, they tend to be positive in the way they talk about their life in a while. This makes them feel comfortable around the one who has asked the questions as they associate them with the sensation caused by their questions.

Repeating Words

Some people may find this annoying, so before proceeding, one must be able to make their own judgments on whether this will be perceived as a good thing or will just put people off. The trick is to repeat the three last words that someone says when they are sharing some information. For example, if someone says "I'm so tired from last night" the would should ask "from last night?". This will encourage the first person to relate what happened the night before, which also makes the subject about themselves. As seen at the beginning of this list, people's favorite subject is their own lives and interests. It will also show that the person who has asked the question is paying attention to the conversation.

Do Not Complain About Others

Not only people dislike to spend their time talking about negative subjects, but it is also a fact that when a person complains about another, they become associated with these traits. It is better if they praise someone else, this way they will be connected with a positive feeling or opinion they have on another individual. Besides, complaining about other people shows that someone may be involved in gossip. It is hard to trust a person who is known to talk about others negatively behind their backs.

Be That Person

There is always that person who cares about the others, who notices everyone in the room, and goes out of their way to make everyone else to feel included. The best way to conquer people's love is to be that person. Someone who makes others happy will be surrounded by positivity and will have a good impression on everyone. It is almost impossible to dislike someone who makes everyone feels at home, and those who do are most certainly jealous or have something lacking in their own lives. In order to be certain that they are a good person, someone should aim to be the one who they would always like to have around.